David Altshuler, M.S.
(305) 978-8917 | [email protected]

Category: Parenting

Adorable/Deplorable

Nineteen preschoolers twirled to the right; Jenny spun to the left. A dozen four-year-old children flung both hands in the air; Jenny sat down. The kids made a circle following one another conga style as the melodies oozed from the small speakers. Children smiled and bowed as the performance ended

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Do You Know Anyone Who…?

It doesn’t take a crystal ball or a master’s in counseling psychology—not that I happen to have either—to know where the conversation is going: “Do you know anyone who has Covid?“  Did I say conversation? Because of course I meant, diatribe. And I was hardly compulsory as a participant. I

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Headline

Should have made the The New York Times, the lead story on the nightly news on all the networks. The international press should have been clamoring, lines of paparazzi photographers camped outside our home. On January 25th 2021, my younger daughter loaded the dishwasher without being asked. How did the

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Welcome. It’s Nice to See You.

Apparently there are physiological reasons why Mile 20 is notoriously wretched. A 150-pound person can store about 2000 calories and uses around 100 calories per mile. At mile 20, the stores are depleted. No more glycogen. The body–starved for fuel–burns everything available. Think about a bitterly cold night, a fire

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Janet of the Apes

JANET  But it’s pretty bad, isn’t it? I know it’s pretty bad. Ever since I can remember…ever since I was a little girl…people have turned away from me. The very first thing I can remember is a little child screaming when she looked at me. I never wanted to be

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Jeer Pressure

One of the great things about being a runner is that getting older is a good thing. You’re 65-69? Great! You’ll do better in your new age bracket, now that you don’t have to compete against those fast, young bucks in the 60- to 64-year-old group! One of the great

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Simple Distinction

One of my running buddies tells a story about his immigrant grandfather. Arriving from Europe after the First World War, Mike worked long shifts as a dishwasher, was promoted to cook, eventually opening his own diner. A generation later, my buddy’s grandfather owned four restaurants, employing dozens of people. He

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Horse Sense

Alan Strang, the protagonist of Peter Shaffer’s Equus, commits an act so heinous as to impress theater goers long after the final homeward bound subway ride. Critics view the text as “Shaffer’s exploration of the way modern society has destroyed our ability to feel passion.” They write of Alan’s psychiatrist

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Silence is Golden

Sorry to be late. My granddaughter has a fever. Nothing serious. Maybe 99 point something. Also, this isn’t my computer; I’m using my wife’s computer. So her name is showing up in the Zoom. Not my name. Her name is Peggy. But my name is Bob. So my computer screen

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The Square Root of your Kids

The square root of negative one is a nasty bit of business. The square root of 25 gets invited to parties, has followers on Instagram. Even the square root of 2 is asked to dance occasionally. But the square root of negative one? The square root of negative one is

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Copyright © David Altshuler 1980 – 2022    |    Miami, FL • Charlotte, NC     |    (305) 978-8917    |    [email protected]