David Altshuler, M.S.
(305) 978-8917 | [email protected]

Author: David

Stupid

Here’s an expression that I hear frequently. You may have even said the following words yourself recently. “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.” Yeah? Bring it. You think you’ve got Stupid? Compared to what’s been going on with me this week, you haven’t ever even met Stupid. Stupid doesn’t

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Me! Me! Me! Now! Now! Now!

I want a wife who works, who works out, who takes care of the kids, takes care of herself, takes care of me. I want her to be creative at work and creative in bed. I want her to be a tireless helpmate, to understand herself, her husband, and our

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Kate and Edith

“You’re sending me away to boarding school,” intones ninth grader, Melissa. “I’ll never speak to you again.” “But, Honey, you know the schools here locally are terrible,” Mom responds. “You yourself said that you’re not learning anything, that your teachers are uncaring and borderline abusive, that your classmates can barely

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Keep Coming Back

One of my running buddies, Ron, is snarky, curmudgeonly, sarcastic, and grumpy. On a good day. Ron has a bitter view of the world and agrees with Snoopy, Charles Schultz’s philosopher beagle, who said, “I love humanity; it’s the people I can’t stand.” Ron looks for the darker motivations of

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The Worst of Times?

As a rising seventh grader in the summer of 1967 I was invited to lunch at the home of my band teacher. Mr. Abrams lived walking distance from the junior high where he taught and where I would soon attend. The meal was served by his wife, the mother of

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Eternal Vigilance

Forty year-old, Juan is a two-pack a day smoker, with a sedentary life style and a tire around his tummy that makes the Michelin man look svelte by comparison. Juan can, and frequently does, suck down a six pack of Bud on a Sunday afternoon while watching his beloved Marlins.

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I Never Metaphor I Didn’t Like

Before touring a wilderness therapy program in Hawaii this past March, my wife and I arrived a day early so that we could enjoy the sights of the big island. One of our tourist stops was Volcano National Park. My wife, the science teacher, began explaining about volcano bombs, magma,

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This Brain is Your Brain

There is a story about Enrico Fermi, the great 20th century physicist. A graduate student is trying to impress the professor by spewing off a litany of sub-atomic particles. Fermi puts the student in his place by responding, “Young man, if I could remember the names of those particles, I

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The End of Expensive College?

When Harvard University denied Warren Buffet’s candidacy for admission, the university smiled on two out of three applicants. Today, Harvard admits two applicants out of 33, around six percent. “Competitive” as admissions may be at some schools, there is a growing sense in our culture that attending college is no

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Copyright © David Altshuler 1980 – 2024    |    Miami, FL • Charlotte, NC     |    (305) 978-8917    |    [email protected]