The Greatest Teacher of All

Recently a number of my gentle readers including some number of my own children have made the wildly unsettling allegation that this author’s advice to parents trying to raise healthy children in our toxic world can be summed up by the phrase “take the kids camping.”

Surely, there is more to adequate parenting in these tough times than just sleeping under the stars, tree roots poking into your neck, in close proximity to raccoon poop. And I would quote journaled research articles from reputable publications supporting this point if only I could find a pencil. 

So, rather than do any actual productive work, I will just state: camping is good for kids because the consequences of their imperfect executive functioning and blundering decision making are both humbling and immediately apparent. 

Forget to bring enough water on a camping trip, for example, and there is a real problem in real time. Before you can say “consequences for actions” never mind “whose desiccated body parts are these strewn about the trail?” you can feel strongly that your children should have paid attention to the one gallon per person per day rule. Whereas in the city, consequences are neither immediate nor meaningful. Sure, you can step in front of a crosstown bus and get smushed but who does that? A rattlesnake is more subtle and, pound for pound, more instructive. 

Are the thoughtful, generous, pleasant people you meet hiking and at campgrounds at glorious National Parks out west nicer than the mean-spirited, snarky, wretched folks who routinely try to steal your hubcaps or sell you stock tips in the city?

To answer this unbiased and imminently reasonable question, consider the following scenario: on a camping trip in the North Georgia mountains some years ago, my sons and I had forgotten to bring an ax with which to chop firewood and were therefore having trouble getting the campfire going. We had a pleasant conversation with some folks from a neighboring campsite, borrowed their ax, made a fire, and ate s’mores until melted marshmallows ran out of our ears and noses. Not an endearing sight admittedly, but ask to borrow an ax from someone on the street in New York City and you get nothing but funny looks. 

Family camping trips also engender unforgettable moments. Not all of which need to be processed with a qualified mental health professional in subsequent years. “Remember the time when we ran out of food on that primitive hike 40 miles from the nearest inhabitation and we had to eat berries and dirt for three days?” 

“When a man is to be hanged in the morning, it concentrates the mind wonderfully” Dr. Johnson said. Without a signal, your children’s electronic devices won’t work. A camping trip might, thereby, force you all to have a pleasant conversation about firewood, rattlesnakes, or raccoon poop. Maybe that’s all there is to raising healthy kids in a world filled with drugs, violent video games, and crosstown buses.