“Colonel Mustard killed Mr. Body in the billiard room with the candlestick”–began no mystery novel ever. The entire genre is called “whodunit” because the joy of reading is trying to figure out–or in my case waiting to be told–who did what to whom and why. The whole point of a
Ellen and Sam fell in love. No surprise there. They had worked together for years, were friends before they started dating. They had everything in common: careers in education, commitment to community service, even a shared fondness for miniature labradoodles. Sam was 45, Ellen 29. But the difference in their
It is well known–and possibly true–that Stephen Hawking’s publisher warned him about using mathematical formulae in his book. “For every equation, you will lose half your readers” so the story goes. If a gentle “e = mc2” can cause people to stop reading, I can only imagine how many of
My dad was weeping in his hospital bed. Being the thoughtful, dutiful son that I am I told him to stop thrashing around. “It’s 3:00 am,” I pointed out. “Some of us have to work in the morning, you know.” It depends who you ask, but in my family we have
Noises usually associated with the trenches of the First World War were coming from somewhere deep within my car. Clearly, something was amiss with the combobulator. Or possibly the framistan. My liberal arts degree safely in a drawer, I called a buddy of mine, the assistant service manager of a
Ellen and Sam fell in love. No surprise there. They had worked together for years, were friends before they started dating. They had everything in common: careers in education, commitment to community service, even a shared fondness for miniature labradoodles. Sam was 45, Ellen 29. But the difference in their
I’m not saying this happened. But you can’t say that it didn’t. You weren’t there. (I usually detest arguments of the form “How could you know unless we’re the same person?” but let’s make an exception for a vignette about a man and his dog.) The only backstory you need
One of my buddies from the gym wants to lose 20 pounds. He does significant cardio six days each week. Andy is becoming a beast on the stair master. He lifts weights too. Chest and triceps one day, back and biceps the next. And abdominal exercises? Don’t ask. A hundred
What is the take away from “Yellow Submarine”? “Avoid Blue Meanies” certainly and possibly “Be Nice,” but the maligned Jeremy Hillary Boob, PhD also instructs, “Ad hoc, ad loc and quid pro quo. So little time, so much to know.” Truer words never uttered by an animated quadruped. That there
As much fun as it is to point fingers, isn’t it even more satisfying to be judgmental? Condescending certainly makes me feel superior. I’m not proud of it, but I have been guilty of viewing myself as above my peers. After all, I get to the gym frequently and on a given
Copyright © David Altshuler 1980 – 2022 | Miami, FL • Charlotte, NC | (305) 978-8917 | [email protected]
