David Altshuler, M.S.
(305) 978-8917 | [email protected]

Author: David

The Greatest Teacher of All

Recently a number of my gentle readers including some number of my own children have made the wildly unsettling allegation that this author’s advice to parents trying to raise healthy children in our toxic world can be summed up by the phrase “take the kids camping.” Surely, there is more to

Read More »

Go Outside and Play

Surely a case could be made for Muhammad Ali, Babe Ruth, Jesse Owens, Wayne Gretzky, Jack Nicklaus, or Michael Jordan as the greatest male athlete of the 20th century. But no vociferous barfly could overlook Jim Thorpe without being asked to step outside and settle the issue. Olympic gold medalist in the pentathlon and decathlon, professional football,

Read More »

Pay Up

Another of my middle aged, balding, paunchy buddies was getting along fine with his girlfriend, getting serious after two years of dating. They were chatting amicably about which caterer to use, making lists of which old friends to invite to the ceremony. Since they were both divorced with grown kids,

Read More »

All Kinds of Fun

Let’s ignore fun now and fun later.  Catching that big bass with your grandchild at that sparkling, secluded spot on that perfect fall day was exquisite at the time and only gets better with each re-telling. “Say the part again about how the fishing pole almost broke, Papa. Tell about

Read More »

It’s Not You, It’s Them

It would be hard to overstate the carnage resulting from the Corvette drag racing down US 1 at over 100 miles per hour slashing through the Chevette turning left on 17th Avenue. Drivers coming upon the destruction assumed that the fire fighters had cut the Chevette in two in order to

Read More »

Objects at Rest

Whether or not Isaac Newton ever met your Aunt Millie from Topeka is an open question to be debated by historical scholars with more sophisticated research tools than those available to this poor author. Newton was born in 1643. Wasn’t that the year in which your mom’s sister was graduated

Read More »

The Expanded Smoking Section

Not the least of the problems with the “smoking section” in airplanes was that the smoke did not pay attention and remain behind row 16 as instructed. As has often been remarked, there is just no talking to some people. The carcinogens in the cigarette smoke did not behave. And

Read More »

Questions

Villagers rush to the side of a man with an arrow in his heart who lies bleeding and gasping on a dusty path. “Who shot him?” inquires the first man to arrive at the shaking body. “Do you think there was an argument?” asks the second. “Of course there must

Read More »

Game, Set, Match

  The 300th best tennis player in the world is so much better than you are at tennis that it is hard to articulate the difference in ability. His second serve is consistently over 90 mph; his understanding of strategy is voluminous. Were you to play a match against the 300th

Read More »

Copyright © David Altshuler 1980 – 2024    |    Miami, FL • Charlotte, NC     |    (305) 978-8917    |    [email protected]