Choice

The choice argument

Tell me if any of the following sound even remotely plausible:

1) I woke up this morning and said to myself: Here’s an idea. I’ll choose to lose my keys. That way instead of getting to class on time, taking relaxed notes, meeting with my “study buddy” to prepare for that tough calculus exam, fulfilling my commitments, and having a great day, I can, to the contrary, spend 45 minutes frantically running around my dorm room stressed to the point of snapping, looking through all my stuff trying to find my keys and be maddeningly late for all my commitments.

2) I woke up this morning and chose to be a procrastinator. I’ll play video games until two in the morning, sleep through my alarm, be unprepared for my first class, exhausted for my second, and completely out of it for my third. I’ll lose my calendar/assignment pad (for the third time this month) so I won’t be able to do any homework even if I could tear myself away from Blood, Blood, Blood, Shoot, Shoot, Shoot, Kill, Kill, Kill long enough to do so. I’ll make it a point to be a pariah to my family, in conflict with my teachers, and in danger of flunking out of high school.

3) I woke up this morning and chose to be a diabetic. I said to myself, “Let’s see how much fun I can have with my pancreas before I pass out and have to be rushed to the ER.”

If losing keys and being a procrastinator have more to do with diabetes (diseases) than with choices–like going to the gym or marrying Sophie Veraga–then how do students get infected with them?

For a brilliant explication of how alcoholism and substance abuse have more in common with diseases than they do with choices, listen to Dr. Kevin McCauley’s brilliant CD, “The Disease Model of Addiction.” For a similarly exquisite insight into how students with behavioral issues aren’t choosing to live in the principal’s office, read Dr. Ross Greene’s Lost at School.

The following outline of the similarities between these two ground breaking works is meant to tantalize and encourage you to acquire and devour each one:

1) Addiction has more in common with a disease than it does with a choice. So does inattention and acting out behavior at school.

2) Addiction may start out as a choice, but it quickly becomes a disease. Inattention and concomitant acting out in the classroom, fits the disease model from the beginning.

3) Both addiction and behavior problems lead to intolerable behaviors, no doubt about it. Addicts and kids who misbehave in the classroom–acting out, stealing, lying, constant trips to the counselor and therapist–are certainly a pain in the neck. But as much as these noxious behaviors seem to be choices they are, in actuality, caused by a defect in the brain–a disease.

4) Nobody would “choose” to become addicted to drugs, alcohol, or poor school performance. Choice is lost for addicts and for students who forget their homework, act out and are constantly in trouble as a result of learning differences or attentional issues.

5) Yelling at these folks, punishing them, stressing them out, makes the problems worse, not better.

6) The loss of productivity and happiness for both alcoholics and kids with “behavior problems” is tragic, measured in the billions of both dollars and tears.

7a) Mice can get addicted to drugs. Mice will behave badly to get drugs.

b) Mice do not have personalities. There aren’t “sociopathic” mice or mice who tell lies about their homework.

8) There is hope for both populations–addicts and kids who have behavioral problems in school. Treatment begins with understanding. Treatment continues one day at a time.

Disclaimer: Neither Dr. McCauley nor Dr. Greene knows of the existence of this column, nor can I pretend to suggest that they would approve of its content if they did. My admiration for their work is equalled only by their lack of awareness of mine.

I await incoming.