David Altshuler, M.S.
(305) 978-8917 | david@davidaltshuler.com

Category: College Admissions

Mother, Please!

“Mother, Please! I’d rather do it myself!” suggests an as yet unmedicated home maker in an iconic 60s commercial. Mom’s transgression? Enquiring if perhaps the stew needs some salt. But, with the benefit of a half century of hindsight, this author wonders if mom’s suggestion was not the first of

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Home. Schooled.

My wife taught fourth grade for years. Recently, her principal asked her to teach fifth grade. “Oh honey,“ I exclaimed, “you got smarter.“ My wife gave me the “teacher look,” usually reserved for an unfortunate combination of ten-year-olds and paper airplanes. Apparently, “you got smarter” is neither novel nor endearing.

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Mr. and Mrs. Charles Brown

Mrs. Charles Brown filed for divorce yesterday in family court citing irreconcilable differences in her marriage of four years. “Who wants to be married to a kid who was bald all the way back in elementary school?” she asked. “And every time I needed change for the dryer, my husband

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Will the be on the Test?

“Why do we have to know this?” “How will this help us in life?” “Will this be on the test?” All teachers endure these questions. All teachers hate these questions. Teachers have a variety of ineffectual responses–possibly because they are blinded by disgust and hatred. Some rejoinders are forceful: You must

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Go Outside and Play

Unsophisticated readers have unfailingly accused this gentle author of pining for a representation of our country’s history that did not ever, in fact, exist. You envision a romantic epoch on the prairie a hundred fifty years ago when family game night was a thing. You think generations living together was

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The Best Exercise

A young adult I know recently completed his DPT, Doctor of Physical Therapy. As a result of his degree, he is now inundated with a repeated query. Everyone wants to stay healthy. Everyone is concerned with getting infected. So everyone asks the same question: what is the best exercise? Is

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Dog Days

As the above photo will attest, our 30-something pound Terrier mix is completely at home crossing an 8-inch wide “bridge“ over a creek. Would the three-foot drop bother him were he to lose his footing? We will never know. Langley walks across those boards like he was born there. He

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You Never Know

“You never know” suggest the strategists tasked with separating you from your dollar. Those designing lottery adverts are compensated by their success. “You never know” is an enticing campaign. The implication—that you might win a million dollars and be able to significantly pay down your credit card debt—is clear. You

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My Busy Day

Parenting “expert” that I purportedly am, I never managed to choose age appropriate books to read to my kids. I’m not particularly proud of this. At seven and eight, they heard Flowers for Algernon, a poignant book with any number of inappropriate themes for recent kindergarten graduates: The beloved narrator plummets

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Personal Statement

High school juniors are currently struggling with college application essays. Nobody enjoys writing to begin with. If anybody did enjoy writing, that person would not be an adolescent effervescing over the crafting of a personal statements for admissions and in the extraordinarily unlikely eventuality that anybody enjoyed writing personal statements,

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