Category Archives: Parenting

Child for Sale

A twenty-five dollar gift certificate, a $2.95 card that reads, “Welcome to the family,” and a 47-cent stamp can undo a year of misunderstanding. Total expenditure: $29.42. Not a bad price to pay for an adult child if you think about it. I know folks who routinely pay $29.42 for bad Chinese take-out food. Bad…Read the full article

Process

Warning: This newsletter contains adult content and may be inappropriate for some readers, offensive to others. A more insightful author than I pointed out recently that the ten billion dollar pornography industry in this country is not comprised of ten perverts each spending a billion dollars. Take it to the bank: if your 16-year-old child…Read the full article

Dog Days

As long suffering readers of these Tuesday musings will allow, nothing gives me greater pleasure than my morning perambulations with my 35-pound outrageous ball of fluff terrier mix. Langley never met a stranger. He unabashedly engages with any and every dog he chances upon.  His entire quivering body exudes, “Wanna frolic”? Invariably a rough-and-tumble game…Read the full article

Right

As it turns out, I’m right. For a little while I thought you might be somewhat right or at least a little bit right. But as it turns out you were thoroughly wrong, 100%. I thought there might be a reason to listen to your point of view, take into consideration some aspects of your…Read the full article

Dishes

Who wants to feel useless? Answer: Nobody. Not even your children. Especially not your children. Kids want to help out. Kids even want to do dishes. Doing dishes makes them feel like the are part of something, that they are not isolated and alone, that they have a part to play. I know, I know….Read the full article

Sun Rise

“Yesterday, I saw the sun rise and the sun set from the same chair.” As the risk of missing the point, I replied, “Must be quite a chair.” “Yeah well, everybody studies hard,” Chad went on. “It’s not competitive necessarily. It’s just that the tests are fairly thorough.” “Thorough,” I thought. “So that’s what they’re…Read the full article

Sex Test

a) Sex is a sacred procreative rite between a man and a woman, subsequent to their sanctified marriage: one life, one partner. b) Sex is a gift determined by an individual and her circumstances. She can do with her body what she wants with whomever she likes as long as she doesn’t take advantage of…Read the full article

Hard Choices

A buddy of mine worked for the Public Defender’s Office for a few years before determining that he would prefer a legal career with sufficient pecuniary compensation to allow him to live indoors. Jimmy is now in private practice as a criminal defense attorney. He still feels good about the work that he does and…Read the full article